This morning I had the privilege of speaking to a MOPS group (Moms of Preschoolers) at a church in Raleigh. After I spoke and did a reading, I opened the floor to questions from the group. While I’m not sure that I had any fixed expectations regarding questions that might be asked, I can say now for sure that I find myself quite surprised by the questions. To date, I’ve spoken with different types of groups but never to a group consisting primarily of mothers of young children. And I’m realizing now that the questions posed by this particular demographic have challenged me more than those of any other group thus far; so, tonight I find myself having even more respect for all those mothers of young children.
While I can’t recall every single question, one I cannot stop recalling has to do with faith and healing. I was asked what part I thought my faith played in the my healing, in the many “miracles” that are part of my story. And I just wasn’t sure how to answer that. I felt myself rambling on as I considered all the possible ways that such a question might be interpreted. (I do often tend to overcomplicate things.)
Was I healed because I had faith? In the gospels, Jesus does tell the woman with the issue of blood that her faith has healed her. But, I have friends, like my beloved J.R. (from The Trench Light chapter in Hear I AM), whose faith I felt always made my own look rather puny; and J.R. had her address changed from down here to Heaven almost two years ago. So, exactly what’s the formula? Several “church” people actually told J.R. that they thought she would have been healed, if only her faith were stronger. Wow. Needless to say, I really struggled with that.
Though I’m still riddled with questions at certain times, I do know that God tells us every good thing is from his hand and this, of course, includes faith. We can take no credit for it at all–faith is indeed his gift. I know too that a little faith goes a very long way, as God tells us that a mere mustard seed would do to move a mountain. And I know too that the object of our faith is what matters more than the amount of it. Yes, the object of our faith is what truly matters more than anything else in this world.
I do believe too that, while many may come to God because they’ve either witnessed or experienced a miracle of healing or even a miracle of some other sort, it takes more than such miracles to sustain one’s faith in God. The onlookers in Jesus’ day are certainly proof of that. They saw his work firsthand yet only a precious few did believe. We seem to be awfully adept at explaining away the good apart from God; and we’re also quite skilled at including God as we explain those things that hurt us the most down here–little to no credit for the good and blame for the bad does indeed appear to be humanity’s pattern throughout history.
We can’t really have it both ways though, can we? He’s either in it all or he’s nowhere. And when I say that he’s in it all I don’t mean as the cause of the pain but as the comfort through it. And this thought is exactly what the woman asking the question this morning brought me to; she said essentially that I don’t claim that I was healed because of my faith, but I do claim that my faith is what actually supported me through my healing. As crazy as it may sound right now, I didn’t realize this until I heard her say it.
So, when I find myself unsure of how to explain the mysteries of God’s order, such as why some precious ones die sooner and others live longer, I must fall back on what I do know to be true about God. He is Love and his Way would have meant none of us ever die…..but obedience to his Way has never really been our strong suit. We made our own mess and continue to do so. Thus, he, God Himself, saw fit to provide a way so all of us would have a choice regarding whether we perish or not–and Jesus the Christ is that way, the Way; it takes faith to believe this, faith that can only come from God Himself. Thank you, North Haven Church MOPS, for having me today, for teaching me–being with you was a privilege!
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